admin
One sunny day in Oklahoma, my friend Jake decided he was going to impress us with his culinary skills by making homemade BBQ ribs. He confidently marinated them overnight, but when he fired up the grill, he realized he’d forgotten to buy charcoal. Instead, he dumped a whole bag of marshmallows on the flames, thinking they would catch fire like some sort of sweet miracle. Spoiler alert: they did catch fire, but not in the way he expected. A cloud of sticky, sugary smoke billowed up, sending the neighborhood birds into a frenzy and leaving us with “ribs” that resembled what you’d find after a sugar factory explosion.
Watching Jake try to salvage his marshmallow-ribs was like witnessing a cooking show gone horribly wrong—think Gordon Ramsay meets a campfire gone wild. With his barbecue sauce now a gooey catastrophe, he ended up serving us soggy marshmallows with a side of dry laughs. We couldn’t stop giggling as he tried to defend his “new gourmet creation,” declaring it a “smoky fusion dish” that would “revolutionize the BBQ industry.” By the end of the night, we all agreed that the only thing he successfully grilled was our sense of culinary expectations!
P
I hope they didn’t take a picture of you taking a picture of the sign.
I
I would love to be apart of their property too
I
You are apart from it. Now, if you want to be a part of it, well that’s another matter.
I
I need a tribute
M
r/whoosh
O
They really took the time to go print these out🤣🤣 they really found him weird
S
At least now we lnow
B
Let’s be honest. Both parties are weird here.
D
No, calling out someone for taking pictures in a bedroom window is not creepy.
J
How is the owner weird for putting a creep on blast? I especially so the neighbors can be on alert.
O
Why is there a clock attached to the… the… the permanent frame for mounting posters of suspected peeping perverts?
M
To check the time probably
R
I am also wondering what that structure is. Looks like there’s a rolled up US flag on a pole behind it?
L
The homeowner’s name is Bill, and that structure is where he posts up his Boards.
M
Because Oklahoma. Spend a few years here and you’ll understand. Or don’t because understanding okies doesn’t really benefit you outside of Oklahoma.
W
Okay, but what’s the reason?
L
So people know what time it is.
G
See people like these all the time in our HOA community. Residents and the rules enforcement morons.
A
Yep, when I lived down in Florida with my dad back in the day, we lived in an HOA, and there were several operatives on our street, such as: * **70 Year Old Bald Guy with Cane**: He was the self-appointed lawn height monitor. He had marked the maximum allowable grass height length on his cane and would walk around the neighborhood with a small notebook and write down the addresses of any house he passed that had blades of grass taller than that marking on his cane. In Florida during rainy season this meant sometimes having to mow not only twice a week but sometimes *3 times* a week to avoid the HOA fine for “failing to maintain our lawn”. Couldn’t cut it too short, either…then it would yellow and get scorched and we would get a fine for that, too. * **Weird Old Guy Sitting in his Kitchen with Binoculars**: This guy lived kitty-corner to us on the other side of the street. For the 18 months we lived there after I moved in, this guy literally sat in his window all day, every day with a pair of binoculars and just watched. Watched what? Yes, watched. Watched *everything*. * **Barb, The Pool Police**: Down the street from our house there was a pool for residents that came out of our HOA fees. It was open to all who lived in the neighborhood and limited guests. Barb (*name changed because nobody knew her real name because she was a fucking nutter and I dont fuck with crazy people*) lived next door to the pool and clearly was very annoyed by the fact that someone apparently held her down at gunpoint and forced her to buy a house next a public pool, because Barb’s sole mission in life was to wait for someone, particularly someone with children, to enter the pool area so she could click them off on her belt counter and ensure not one single person more than the maximum allowed per resident entered the pool unchallenged, even if merely helping carry shit into the pool area and leaving immediately. Barb also hated children with the fury of 1000 suns and the sound of a child’s happiness apparently caused her severe emotional distress so she made sure to squash any sort of enjoyment of the pool as quickly as possible. * **The Mysterious Trash Can Knight**: We never saw this person, but they got us a few times. In our neighborhood there was a rule that all trashcans had to be off of the curb, not visible from the street, within 12 hours of the usual pickup time of 7AM either before or after. Have to head out of town and want to drag them out a few hours early? FUCK YOU. Get caught in traffic on your way home from work and pull them in at 7:45pm instead of 7:00pm? FUCK YOU. Your trashcan gets blown out from the enclosure it sits in on the side of the house, and a few inches of it can be seen from the sidewalk? FUCK YOU. The Trash Can Knight never identified themselves, the only way we knew it was TCK was because whenever we egregiously flaunted that very critical mandate, within 24 hours there was a letter taped to our door *with a fucking picture enclosed* of the front of our house showing the offense with the date and time scrawled on the back. We never saw this person take these pictures, not one time in almost 2 years, but on three occasions found one of those letters on our door with picture and the “7:37 PM???? RIDICULOUS!!!! **7PM!!!!**” scrawled on the back in angry, shaky letters. There were others, too (so many others, fucking miserable-ass retirees with nothing better to do plague the whole damn state) but man oh man was I glad when we finally moved out of that fucking neighborhood. Wasn’t the only time in my life I dealt with HOA horseshit but was definitely the worst, by a mile.
T
My in laws have a mobile home down in a retirement community in FL for the winters. Actually they live in a different condo, but got the old mobile home from my FIL’s mom when she passed. We stay in it when we’re visiting. So it being FL there are a couple community pools. We went down to one one afternoon, a nice long pool. There were 3 old folks hanging out at one end, so my in-laws, my wife, 3 kids, and I all head down to the other side. My FIL and I hang out on lounge chairs, everyone else is in the pool and being *super careful* to keep to their area and not make a ruckus. My 9 year old takes one of those weighted ring toy things that are meant to sink and be brought back to the surface and *lightly tosses it* maybe 2’ in front of him. IM-FUCKING-MEDIATELY one of the old ladies at the completely opposite end of the pool *whips* around and starts shouting that “THERE IS NO THROWING THINGS IN THE POOL CAN’T YOU READ?!?!” It’s crazy how some people with nothing better to do turn their energy into misery.
A
Thank you for sharing I had no idea HOAs could be so bad
H
If you want WTF to have the word why instead of what you need to say “Why TF”
C
YTF
C
Could be missing a comma instead
H
True true
P
Classic window repair guy doing his job
I
I was thinking Tax assessor lol
I
Nah he’s an agent of the woke lib cabal. Hunting down freedom fighters to poison them with the trans
G
Is he smiling ? Creepy
S
I really hope that’s the wife playing a joke on the husband.
J
I guess he isnt on Facebook?!
A
Bro turned paranoia into a full outdoor art exhibit 😭📸 Imagine driving by and getting lore instead of directions.
D
Random rust camera spotted
F
One billboard outside of Tulsa, Oklahoma
G
Lmao. I grew up in OK I can totally imagine this happening in my hometown. 🤣
GIPHY App Key not set. Please check settings