admin
Title: Shopping for a dress to wear to my niece’s wedding.
I recently embarked on the daunting quest of finding the perfect dress to wear to my niece’s wedding. Armed with a credit card and an overabundance of confidence, I ventured into the sea of sequins and pastel colors. After trying on what felt like one hundred dresses—each more questionable than the last—I finally found a stunning number with a beautiful floral pattern, only to realize it was a size too small. Once I squeezed myself into it, I left the dressing room feeling like a simultaneously elegant and domed-up sausage.
As I waddled out to show my reflection, I caught sight of my reflection in the mirror and burst into laughter. It looked like I was auditioning for a role in a low-budget fashion show, desperately trying to hold it all together without splitting a seam. I finally settled on a dress—one that allowed me to breathe and sit down. All that’s left to do now is pray that the cake at the wedding is worth every cringe-worthy dress moment.
in Funny
Looking for a dress to wear to my niece’s wedding.
G
So was Gray Anus the winner?
M
Probably after riga mortis sets in
E
rigid anus
S
That’s absolutely unforgivable labelling it like that. Wisteria is lavender, not blue.
P
Can’t believe they’d mix up blue anus and wisteria.
G
And listeria is a shade of brown.
U
Is… That not lavender? Are my eyes malfunctioning? It looks lavender to me. I’m freaking out!
D
It must have been heavily used.
J
Outside of the US, it’s referred to as “Grey Anus.”
E
What is it on the inside?
E
Mostly pink
J
Healthcare sucks and the politics are depressing. But we’ve got good food, so there’s that.
S
As Alaska Thunderfuck once said, “Anusthing is possible.”
K
It puts the gray anus on its skin or it gets the hose again.
E
They were going to go with “thrombosed hemorrhoid,” but marketing intervened.
H
I was thinking you were asking which one to pick – then I saw Gray Anus. Like WHAT?
P
Supposed to be gray anise maybe?
N
My favorite Crayola color!
N
Hue ganus gray
E
Purple waffle, Misses opportunity
M
Indigo vageen
T
I would demand to wear cheery pink anus at least!
T
….What’s the color palette?
O
That’s what happens when you bleach it too much
D
Get it!! In this case it’s pronounced: a niece.
S
PSA: If your anus is gray, please go see a doctor.
S
Definitely gray anus
M
Don’t wear an anus
S
I wonder is they sell that color at a paint store!
O
Gray anus, but no Brown Star?
GIPHY App Key not set. Please check settings