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Detonating lawnmower
A
With the flip flops too
C
My grandmother died in the late 90s, but she spent the last 30 years of her life with only 2 and a half toes on one foot from mowing the grass without any shoes on. She was probably as drunk as this guy looks.
S
Some of those little piggies went to the bar that day and never made it back
Y
In fairness, while drunk lawnmowing accidents do occur, percentage-wise they’re pretty low compared to the number of people who get drunk, mow their lawns, and don’t injure themselves substantially.
C
i thought getting drunk was a prerequisite for mowing the lawn.
S
The idea is that you are supposed to *get drunk* while mowing, not *be drunk* before you mow. That way mowing only slowly gets unsafer and when you’re done you can kick back for a nice afternoon in the recliner and watch the game with a good buzz until you take a nap.
B
Those of us with small yards don’t have time to get sufficiently drunk while mowing and have to pre-game.
M
I can mow my entire front and back lawns in less than 10 minutes. Living in a townhouse has its advantages. I really should just pave over the back lawn, I don’t use it.
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[deleted]
H
I hired a kid to mow my lawn to help him make money for basketball camps. He showed up in flip flops and I told him I can’t let you mow without better shoes. He called him mom and complained and she came and picked him up. Didn’t bring him better shoes, but took his side that I was being a dick. Good riddance.
H
Probably would have sued you too after the kid got hurt due to their own negligence. Some people are just miserable.
G
Rough lesson but good on you taking it seriously. Glad you were not maimed dude!
C
Today I Learned that steel-toed sneakers are a thing that exists.
S
I don’t have the dramatic story, but if I’m using a line trimmer or pressure washer, steel cap boots, every time. I’d include a mower in that statement, but we don’t have one of those.
G
Good call on steel toed boots while pressure washing. Those things are dangerous as hell. From what I’ve heard pressure washers will cause a nasty infection because the water pushes bacteria into the wounds it creates.
W
My friend growing up didn’t realize just how powerful a pressure washer can be, he put his hand a few inches from the nozzle and pulled the trigger. Luckily he only pulled it for half a second but it still sliced his hand open pretty good.
D
I was like this guys either drunk or a veteran. He barely flinched when that shit went off
L
He’s walking just fine, maybe he’s just not the reactive type.
D
That’s exactly something a loony gecko would say
T
I don’t think a Nike is going to stop a lawnmower blade.
B
Maybe not “stop”, but could be the difference between 3 severed toes and a few broken/bloody toes
G
Ripped open the top of my shoe instead of the top of my foot
F
It’s nice when things getting pulled and ripped are not attached to other flesh and bone. Even a flimsy glove can be handy for taking the edge off things.
D
Except not with a rotary machine like a drill press, mill, or lathe. If you get leather or textile gloves caught in something like that you’re gonna have a bad day
F
Always an exception. The phrase I’ve heard regarding those is that clothes will feed you to the machine.
B
Obviously lathes and other rotating machinery should be used naked.
M
Aren’t gloves always handy? I mean, exclusively?
B
Nope, cuts through the shoe and toes, hence my user name.
J
How do you know that instead you would have been Becky_6?
B
Angle of impact.
C
Ding ding ding! It is precisely the difference between a mangled shoe with slightly damaged toes and a mangled foot.
D
Plus whatever shrapnel is in the yard. The blade kicks rocks, nails whatever out in any given direction outward.
L
It can help protect your feet from rocks, sticks, and other things that fly out from under mowers. Same with pants and eye protection.
H
> Same with pants DON’T TELL ME HOW TO MOW MY LAWN!
T
This is the real answer. In the blades? Nope, only a steal toe will stop it.
S
Isn’t that what the blades do? Steal toes?
T
lol I’m leaving it.
M
I, and the groove on my left big toe, can attest that neither do “Boat Shoes”. I got stupid lucky at 15 or 16 or so and slipped while cutting a ditch. Toe looked like an open Pez Dispenser, but aside from the nail being popped off, they were able to sew me back up.
G
I worked with a guy that had been accepted by a professional baseball team (KC Royals I think) but before he started he was mowing the lawn and lost two fingers while moving a rock that was in his way.
P
I’m confused how did he lose his fingers moving a rock
G
He went to move the rock. The mower rolled forward unexpectedly. I think it was on an incline and he wasn’t paying attention. It was a long time ago
S
My neighbor across the street lost the ends of all the fingers on his right hand down to the first knuckle reaching into a lawnmower to clear out some stuck grass. When he reached in to remove the grass, he accidentally moved the blade enough to start the mower. This was about 50 years ago, and safety standards weren’t really a thing. Old mowers could start just from moving the blade and causing compression in the engine. Nowadays, I have an electric mower that can’t start unless you pull a lever, hold it down and simultaneously hold a button for 3 seconds.
B
This dude got really fucking lucky.
S
Those are steel thong flip flops, approved for high rise construction and metallurgy in third world countries.
B
Don’t stick your feet under the mower?
B
This only happens when you borrow someone else’s shit. Then you have to explain how you were doing nothing when suddenly it exploded, knowing full damn well they will never believe you.
T
Guess we gotta learn from this guy and make sure only to ever use a borrowed mower on camera.
T
Would you still need to buy your friend a new mower because you borrowed it and it broke on your watch?
S
I’d invoke the Lemon Law
B
I personally would just because I feel like those are the socially understood laws, and that it’s more in the friends court to understand and sympathize with the situation. I live by the idea that life isn’t perfectly fair, and few hills are worth actually dying on.
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